A Year in Books

C.S. Lewis once said, "No book is really worth reading at the age of ten which is not equally – and often far more – worth reading at the age of fifty and beyond."

This is one of the real treats of parenthood for me: introducing my kids to beautiful books and also experiencing them myself.

This has been the year of the chapter book. We have read many, many picture books this year, but my three oldest have all come to love longer stories (so much so that they make Daniel tell them stories in chapters at night). The books below were some of our favorites. Daniel and I have enjoyed them just as much the kids have, if not more.

Charlotte's Web--This was the first chapter book we read together as a family, and also the book that made me realize they were all ready for a steady diet of chapter books. They didn't want me to put it down!

Winnie-the-Pooh & The House at Pooh Corner- These are charming, funny, oh so cleverly written. We all loved them, but Timmy and Genevieve named them their favorite books we read together. The stories work independently of one another, so we often go back and re-read our favorites them when the mood strikes.

Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle--A series of books about a woman with cures for all kinds of ills that strike children, from not wanting to make their beds to refusing to take a bath. Laugh-out-loud funny, and also good for kids who might suffer from these conditions too.

Peter Pan--Daniel's favorite read of the year. This one is also extremely clever and laugh-out-loud funny. A classic for a reason! I do, however, prefer this as a read aloud because there is a bit of language (Tinkerbell has a foul mouth!).

A Little Princess--A beautiful book about a girl left at a boarding school after her mother dies. When her father dies, she is left destitute. A beautiful story of redemption, it had me crying (sad and happy tears) with each chapter. This one was my favorite (I think...so hard to choose!). 

Homer Price--This book is old fashioned in the best way! The stories are humorous and McCloskey's illustrations can't be beat!

The Moffatts--A collection of stories about a poor family who have lots of adventures in the small town where they live. This one gave us warm fuzzies and a lot of laughs.

My Father's Dragon (series)--An adventure story about a boy who sets out to rescue a baby dragon. Highly imaginative. I read these to Tim before naptime, and he loved them. I think we read the whole series in a week. He still asks to read them often.

A Bear Called Paddington--These are sort of a cross between the Winnie-the-Pooh stories and Curious George. Paddington is a charming bear who gets himself into lots of trouble. Very funny.

Just So Stories--These stories were on our reading list for school. They had the kids (and me) in stitches. The language is a little thick, so I would recommend for older children.

The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe--C.S. Lewis is incomparable. Every time I read about Aslan, I fall more in love with Jesus. The kids were spell-bound.

The Night Fairy-A beautifully written adventure about a fairy who must learn to survive without her wings. Everyone loved this one.

Blue Fairy Book-This book was also a part of our curriculum for this past year. It is a collection of fairy tales, many of them the original tellings (Perrault's Cinderella, for instance). Ava loves fairy tales, so she picked this as her favorite. We have also loved this volume from Usborne. Also beautifully told and illustrated, but the tales are shorter and at a more accessible reading level.

This has been such a fun new adventure for me as a parent. I have so enjoyed experiencing these stories together as a family. I'm looking forward to reading aloud with them as long as they'll let me!

What books have you enjoyed reading with your kids?

He Already Paid for That

We were walking out the door for Ava's end of the year program when a look of horror spread across her face.

"Mom! I have to find my recorder! If I can't find it, you'll have to pay for it!"

I hadn't seen her recorder in over a month. Perhaps I had assumed she had returned it to her music teacher. Most probably, I hadn't thought about it at all.

"Sweetie, check your backpack. If it's not in there, we'll just have to leave. We're going to be late if we don't leave now!"

It wasn't there.

In the car, Ava kept pressing: "You'll have to pay for that."

I'm a failure. I can't keep up with anything.

"You'll have to pay for that."

Too many moving parts. Too many.

"You'll have to pay for that."

I'm drowning.

"You'll have to pay for that."

I snapped.

"Stop saying that! This is not my fault! I didn't know that you hadn't turned it in!"

Not my finest parenting moment.

***

I believe in grace. I believe in showing my kids the glorious, deep, unconditional grace of Jesus.

But I'm not him, and doing that proved to be more complicated than I once thought.

When we first got past the diapers and spit-up stage of parenting, I thought giving grace to my kids would mean forgiving them when they messed up and constantly pointing them back to the cross. And it is that.

But I think that's the easy part, because it mostly happens in what I call the "intentional" moments of parenting, when I have taken time to slow down, breathe deep, and pray through what I say to my kids.

What's harder to control is what leaks out of me when I'm stressed, hurried, and feeling guilty myself. In these situations, I'm liable to succumb to using the motherly device we all know and love--the guilt trip.

Late for church? It's because you couldn't find your shoe. Dirty house? Little animals! Lost recorder? You should have kept up with it.

In reality, we were late for church before we had children, our house was never spick and span, and I probably lost my recorder as a kid too.

It's not that my kids bear no responsibility in these situations; they just don't bear all of it. And when I try to make them bear the full weight of it, it crushes them.

Simply put, I can't give grace when I'm not living in it myself. If I'm not, I'll always be blame-shifting. I'll be trying to earn acceptance and approval and throwing guilt on whoever is most vulnerable.

Author Rachel Jankovic has written that as mothers, we are to "take the grace that God has extended to [us], and feed [our] children with it. Apply what you believe about God’s mercy and kindness and long suffering towards us, and pour it out to them."

Scripture reminds us that it's his kindness that draws up to repentance. At first glance, this is counter-intuitive. But really, who will confess sin to an angry, vindictive father? It's when we are confident of his acceptance that we are set free to confess our sins and turn from them. We don't have to blame-shift.

We can own our weaknesses and sins because we have confidence in a Savior who took them upon himself. I can live in grace and show it to my kids because he already paid for that.

***

Epilogue: Lest you misunderstand and think me a "cheap grace" person: I did talk to Ava's music teacher and verify that I, indeed, did not need to pay for that. ;)

Reflections on our Second Year of Homeschooling

It's mid-summer, and I'm far enough removed from the daily homeschooling grind to be able to reflect on last year. We had a great year in many ways. We are starting to get our feet under us; so much has improved since that crazy first year! I am far more at peace about our decision to homeschool and far more confident in the direction we are headed.

Here are a few brief reflections on the this second year of homeschooling:

Learning is embedded in the culture of our home. We are very intentional about much of the learning that happens here. But I am amazed how much the kids learn even when we have a more unstructured kind of day. They watch the critters and birds outside and identity them. They use their imaginations to apply the things they have learned. They study a globe or read a book about a famous person. They play strategic games and ask lots of questions. I really don't fear taking a day off because they still learn so much.

It's okay if our home school doesn't look exactly like the local elementary school. From time to time I wonder if I am doing them a disservice trying to balance homeschooling and caring for toddlers and maintaining order in the house. I wonder if they really should be in a school for 6 or 8 hours a day. The education of a child is a big thing to be responsible for; I certainly don't want to mess it up! But when I see them loving to learn and finding their passions and getting to enjoy being outside, I know that this is absolutely the right choice for our family and our kids. I know that it's okay that school only takes half a day. It's okay that they don't sit still during read aloud time. It's okay that I'm calling out spelling words while I do the dishes or doing Tim's Phonics lesson while I chop vegetables for dinner. It's okay.

Time is a gift. One of the most wonderful things about homeschooling is the time I get to spend with my kids and the time they have to play, create, move around, and go outside. Our days are certainly full, but we have a lot of freedom in what they are full of. I love that.

Reading aloud is the best. This has been the year that our kids made the jump to chapter books. We still read a lot of picture books too, but I have loved hearing our kids beg me to "keep going!" when I finish a chapter. We are usually reading two books at a time (aside from the reading we do for school): one that I am reading in the mornings and one that Daniel is reading at night. It's become a part of the culture of our family, and I love it.

A good routine makes a lot of learning possible. If last year was the year that we figured out our beliefs about homeschooling, this is the year we figured out how to actually do it. We spent a lot of time streamlining things around here and creating routines for everything from grocery shopping to getting ready in the morning. As a result, we accomplished so much more and our days were far less stressful.

Homeschooling is still a difficult choice; I'm constantly juggling the demands of school, the home, and our kids. We all have enjoyed it so much, though. There are still days that I want to throw in the towel, but those days are fewer and farther between now. I'm more able to maintain perspective. With a new co-op and a toddler that finally sleeps through the night, I'm excited about what this new year will bring. But still not quite ready for summer to be over. :)

A Letter to My Littles (On No Occasion in Particular)

Oh my littles,

It's been a while since I wrote any of you a letter. You all have kept me busy (the good kind of busy), and this space has suffered a bit. I got behind, felt guilty, and then gave up for a little while. I'm sorry, loves.

Since school is "out" for the summer (meaning, of course, that you will no longer stay inside) and it's nobody's birthday in particular, I thought I would scribble down this little missive in hopes of getting back on track by the time your birthdays come 'round again.

Ava,

You are seven. I can't believe how grown up you are. You just learned to ride a bike without training wheels. You decided that it was time, and by golly you didn't give up until you had mastered it. I don't think you cried at all during the whole process. Just got back on when you fell off until you didn't fall anymore. All of a sudden, you were riding down the street into the sunset all by yourself, and it seemed that you might just ride right off to college.

It's indicative of how you are growing, and I see it other ways too: how you  call your younger three siblings "the kids" and in the knowing way you say "mom" with two syllables when I'm just a little too silly.  I see it in the kinds of conversations we have and in your growing beauty. You are grappling with big questions and finding your way. 

Even though it's bittersweet, this growing up is beautiful to watch. I love watching you discover your passions. You appreciate beauty--in art, music, a good book, the natural world, or a frilly dress. You love to draw; I find little doodles on napkins and math homework and our little inbox is usually filled to overflowing with artwork. You love to read and you will do it anywhere--at the dinner table, the grocery store, or while you are brushing your teeth. You are making great strides at the piano, and I can tell that you love to play. You are bubbly and funny and wicked smart.

Love, my prayer for you is that your creativity, your love of learning, your curiosity would lead you to wonder at the world and the God who made it. I pray that he would use your many gifts for his glory.


Tim,

A few weeks ago, when I was fixing your hair for your Aunt Jen's wedding, I asked you to look at the light switch in the bathroom. It just happened to be the particular direction I needed you to face to get your part just right. I thought you might not find it the most interesting subject for your gaze, so I added sarcastically, "Because it's so interesting." You replied, "It's not interesting on the outside, but it's very interesting on the inside."

This is so much who you are: constantly thinking on how things work and finding things to wonder at that most people don't even notice. Your brain is methodical and literal. It's like you are taking the world apart and putting it back together in your head. I wish I could see the world through your eyes. I'm glad I get glimpses.

You are going to be in kindergarten this year. I'm not even sure what that means, considering you've been tagging along with Ava educationally the past two years. You love math, and ask to do it frequently. In fact, to calm you down, we ask you math facts. You also love handwriting and phonics. You are reading better all the time. I love watching you learn.

You are learning (sometimes slowly) to protect your sisters. You will often nobly grab a shoe to squash any offending bugs. You are very sweet and also very passionate.

I pray that you will grow in faith and in wisdom and that you would possess a gentle strength that would one day bless your future family.

Genevieve,

You are the most likely of this crew to tell me out of the blue how much you love me. You are also the mostly likely to declare that you are never going to speak to me again.

That never lasts for long. You are chatty and affectionate and never very far from my side. You love nothing better than to snuggle down in my lap and enjoy a good book together.

You are three, and perhaps strong-willed even for your age. You know what you like, and how you like it. You are passionate about horses and the color purple. You love baby dolls and ballet and all things frilly and girly. With a side of superhero.

Have I mentioned that you're passionate?

My dear, you possess a strength of spirit that I pray God would bend and use for his kingdom. You feel deeply. We pray all the time that God would make you passionate about the right things.

Clara,

When you were around four or five months old and were reliably able to hold up your head, we started to play a game with you. Your Daddy or I would take you and peak your little body around the corner and wait for the other little people to discover you. We called it a "Clara Bomb," and it was always funny.

In time, we realized how appropriate this little game was. You are a little joker, and you do this type of thing all the time. Your daddy pointed out that you are a little "photo bomb" for life. Wherever we are, you are somewhere on the fringes doing something crazy and hilarious. You are always popping out from funny places. You seem to delight in surprising us. Since we homeschool, I suppose we could call you the "class clown."

You love to make people smile, and you're good at it. Most of the things you say are said through giggles. We get you up in the morning, you giggle. We give you a snack, you giggle. Someone comes over for a visit, you giggle. You are such a joyful child, and you add so much joy to our days.  We are having fun getting to know you and are looking forward to hearing the hilarious things you'll say when you're just a little older. 

For you I pray that you will come to know Jesus early, and until then, that my love for you would be like a mirror, reflecting his love for you.

To all of you--Raising you is hard work. I get flustered sometimes. But I want you to know--I hope you know--how much I delight in you. I love getting to be here with you, watching you learn and grow and find your passions. It's a privilege. So is being your mama.

I love you always. No matter what.

Mama

This is How We Do It: Vacation!

This post is part of a link-up my friends Lori and Ashley are hosting. I'm a little late to the party, but you can view that link-up here and here.

***

I am a bit of a homebody. I like to have fun as much as anyone, but I tend to enjoy staying close to home, doing things like swimming, visiting museums, and going on bike rides. I like having adventures within the confines of our own routines (e.g. I like to be home for naps and bedtime).

Homebody, meet Adventurer.

That little speck is him.

My husband likes to go new places, see new things, even if it means that we get out of our normal routine and have to squish all of us in one room overnight.

He is good for me.

I love that he pushes me to do things outside what is easiest and most comfortable for me. I think staycations are awesome (and sometimes needed), but he pushes me to go places and do things that I wouldn't otherwise. And those times traveling with our kids and experiencing new things together have been (and will be) some of our best memories together.

This is how we do it:

Location, location, location.

We really like being outside, and our vacation choices reflect that. Here are some places we've visited (and a few we hope to!)

Texas and Missouri--Our families are both out of town, so we spend quite a bit of our vacation time traveling to visit either Texas (my parents) or Missouri (his parents). When at my parents in Dallas, we visit cousins, go to museums, get peaches (when in season), play at parks, and see friends.

Us having fun at the Perot Museum in Dallas

Daniel's parents live on a farm, so there, we ride the tractor, the 4-wheelers, walk around in the corn, and go down to the river.

Colorado--Both Daniel and I love the mountains, and we grew up going to family camp every year at Horn Creek Conference Grounds in the Sangre de Cristo range. We went different weeks our whole lives, and finally met when we were summer staffers there. It holds many, many special memories for us. We have been a few times since we had kids, but it is an 18-hour drive from our house (as the Google maps), so we will probably wait a couple years until we do it more regularly.

Horn Peak, home of Horn Creek!

Michigan--A couple years ago, some sweet friends offered us the use of their vacation home in Michigan. We had a blast! It was such a mix of rest and fun (which was nice because I was 8 months pregnant!). We picked raspberries, played on the beach, went to Sleeping Bear Dunes. I'm a bit of a beach snob (we lived in Hawaii for five years, after all!), but I was pleasantly surprised how wonderful Lake Michigan's beaches are. The water was clear, shallow, and warm (perfect for wading and splashing) and the sand was clean (perfect for sand castles!). We had so much fun, we decided to go back this year. We reserved a place in Petoskey through AirBnB because we love to ride bikes, and there are lots of bike paths and trails to choose from. My folks are coming too, which makes it extra awesome!

We have lots of other places on our list for when our kids are older, like The Smokey Mountains, Assateague Island (I loved the Marguerite Henry books as a kid), Washington, D.C., and maybe New York City.

The Packing. 

I'm not sure that there is a task that my particular brain is less suited for than packing. I have a hard time keeping track of the things that can be packed ahead of time, the things that need to packed the morning of, the things that need to be packed but are sitting wet in the washer. But, I find that it helps a lot to have a checklist. I have a reusable one that I use for road trips in an app called Paperless. I just go through the list, select the things I need, and check off the items as I gather them up. It helps a lot not to have to figure it out each time!

Road Tripping 

Since airfare + minivan rental are not in our budget, we pretty much drive everywhere now (I sometimes fly to Texas with children #3 and #4, but that's logistically complicated and uninteresting, so I'll spare you).

Our older kids especially are great travelers; Daniel recently did a 15 hour trip in one shot and stopped a total of three times. The little ones are doing better than they used to, but still have a hard time past about three or four hours.

We do have some tricks and tips that help get through those hours, though.

Books--Our kids love to read/look at books. Ava will read anything on the road now; I pack her novels, picture books, and comic books (she's partial to Mutts and Calvin and Hobbes). I also try to get new Look-and-Finds at the library for the pre-readers, and I always pack the Books That Make Noise for the littlest ones. Because listening to Elmo beckoning my child to use the potty is better than screaming, amiright? A dish tub like the one below works well for books because it is not so wide that it blocks the buckles for their seat belts.

Coloring & Toys--I usually keep a bag of activities which include coloring books, sudoku puzzles, crayons, (markers always turn bad, see below) and toys that are one piece (like bead mazes, puppets, and latch puzzles).

Unsanctioned (but fun!) Activity

Audiodrama and Audiobooks- Our kids LOVE Adventures in Odyssey. We have been gifted a lot over the years, so we have a pretty solid collection, but we also get new ones from the library. (If you're new to Odyssey--this set and this set are a great place to start!). We have also enjoyed the Radio Theatre Chronicles of Narnia Series (though they are more suitable for older kids). On our trip to and from Texas, we listened to Winnie-the-Pooh (this version had different voices for all the characters, and was highly enjoyable). The kids also really enjoyed Pippi Longstocking (we listened to the entire thing twice!).

"iBag"--We haven't historically watched movies in the car. This last trip though, I jerry-rigged a plastic bag (mine was one of those bags that sheets come in), cut a hole for the auxiliary cable, and mounted it with the iPad in between the front two seats. We were making a two day drive, and it helped so much to let them watch a movie when (especially) the little ones started to get restless.

Craft Caddy turned Lunch Caddy--I got these little caddies for a dollar each in the Target One Spot. They are the perfect size for little lunches--either kids meals or homemade "momables." They make lunch on-the-go a lot easier. I use them around town quite a bit too!

Pulley System--We have a minivan, which means that my oldest two kids are WAY back there. A couple of years ago, I happened upon this idea for a pulley system to get things back to them. It works wonderfully. It keeps me from having to turn around so much (which is good because I get carsick), and also from nailing my son in the head with a sippy cup (again. Sorry, Buddy).

Totally staged these pictures! 

Date it up!--Once we are in the car, Daniel and I usually have some time to talk while the kids listen to Odyssey or nap. We often use these times to talk about the bigger picture--how to respond to what the kids are struggling with, planning for whatever new season we're coming into. It's kind of like a really long date. Punctuated by demands of "WA-WA!" Hey, you take what you can get, right?

When We Get There 

Once we get to wherever we are going, we try to strike a balance of fun and relaxation. Vacations need to be restful for us, but we don't want to loaf around the whole time either. We go on adventures, but also spend time doing more low key activities, like playing games (Did I just say that games were low-key? In my house?). In short, we do stuff that satisfies the Homebody and the Adventurer. The goal of vacation for us is to pause from the everyday, spend time together, and make memories.

Catching Pancakes at Horn Creek

Hike Date

Mountain Meadows

Lincoln Logs!

Dirt Bikes in Michigan

S'mores!

That's how we do it! How do you?

This is How We Do It: Dinner Time and Freezer Cooking

This post is part of a link-up that my friends at The Boutelle Family Blog and Grace Mountain Diaries are hosting. You can find that link-up here and here.

Take one toddler just woken from nap, add pinch of preschooler coloring appendages with marker. Mix in one always hungry boy who probably needed a nap but didn’t take one. Add one living room in dire need of clean-up and dinner in need of cooking. Stir and let simmer.

Result: Grumpy Soup.

That hour before dinner can be crazy, and I struggled with it for a long time. It seemed that I was in high demand and short supply. Mostly, I just felt like I needed more hands.

I had tried to use the crockpot in the past without much success. I was forever forgetting to set out meat to thaw, and it always seemed that I needed to be putting things on right when our naptime routine was happening. I also always struggled to find recipes that work for my gluten-free, dairy-free (and mostly sugar-free) diet.

When our fourth child was born, some dear friends arranged meals for us. One of those friends brought me a crockpot freezer meal. I made it, and it was so easy. I just stuck the ingredients in crockpot, turned it on, and walked away.

Amazing.

I started fiddling with recipes and tried to prep meals on the weekends, but found it hard to get into a groove. I still felt like I was always cooking.

Then I was talking to my Dad one night, and he said something to the effect of: “You should just always double what you’re cooking. It’s more efficient that way.”

As I thought more about it, I realized that there are three or four meals that we have almost every week (without complaint—they are family favorites). With that much repetition in our meal plan, it was a much better use of my time to quadruple those recipes (adding in a few other things for variety). This meant I would only have to do heavy meal prep once a week.

So, each week when Ava was at co-op (and I wasn’t homeschooling), I would make a big batch of something. After a few weeks of doing this, I had a stockpile, and most nights I could just pull something out and re-heat it, maybe quickly cooking a veggie or some rice or noodles.

Dinner is (Almost!) Served

This has been revolutionary.

Most of what needs to be done I can now do one-handed (which is necessary when that little one wants to be held). It frees me up to supervise and help the kids more with the chores they need to do and allows me to even be outside with them some in the evening (which in turn helps me to actually see my neighbors). It has also helped us eat dinner at a normal time, which keeps their bedtimes from getting too late. Things can still get a little hectic, but I don’t get nearly as stressed out during the witching hour.

Long story short, Grumpy Soup is no longer on the menu.